Driftwood music?

This summer is all about 
gathering what we find
and making music
out of it.
 
Sometimes it doesn't quite fly,
like our xylophone
constructed of driftwood
and rubber bands.

Scavenged from a sunny beach walk,
and a hoot to make,
it only makes one sound:
plunk.

And yet... sometimes we need to plunk
to figure out what the rhythm is.

Our new rhythm :
Winnie's had her surgery,
and after a long wait,
she can run!
the pain is almost gone!

Oh, the delight!

And here we are
in the crazy whirl.

Driftwood:
Winnie's surgery.  Swim lessons. Backyard soccer.
Cousins. Library storytime. 

Scissor mishaps.


{That's right. Preschool cutting practice.
Both of them. Missing chunks of hair.
Where was their mama, you ask?
Ten yards away, scribbling in my notebook. }


   

This has been such a year and more 
of wind and weathering.
and here is what I remember -

beautiful things come after turbulence.

sticks become pale as silver when they have tumbled through waves.
spiny stones become round and ripe across the sand,
fruit of sea and storm,
borne through time
and tides.

Is that art? music?
The transformation of rough things

into smooth beauties?

These tides might not be fruitful
in all the artsy, writerly ways I've been wanting.

but they might just be fruitful in the ways that I need.

humbling. compassion. grace. gratefulness.



To my friends going through rough waters right now,
my wish and prayer

is that Love will weather its way
through each of us
that Love will transform the rough places into smooth,
will fill the hollow places with sweet, clear water,
will turn our broken sticks into music,

and somehow
find us 
more of Love itself.


Thank you for your words and prayers,
books and courage
that have helped us march through this summer!
We are all so grateful.

Some of our brave reads:

Brother Hugo and the Bear - Katy Beebe, S.D. Schindler
Have You Seen My Dragon? - Steve Light
Soccer Fence - Phil Bildner, Jesse Joshua Watson

A Tangle of Knots - Lisa Graff
Word After Word After Word - Patricia MacLachlan
The Mysterious Benedict Society - Trenton Lee Stewart
A Wrinkle in Time - Madeleine L'Engle

Inside Out and Back Again - Thanhha Lai
Nightengale's Nest - Nikki Lofton
Small Acts of Amazing Courage - Gloria Whelan

And here's a fun thing:

There's a game of author-illustrator tag
running through blogland lately,
and I got tagged by my genius illustrator dad,
Richard Jesse Watson.
I'll post my scoop next week.

 

Bottled Courage

This girl.
this one.


Winnie
(a.k.a. Kaylen)
has a bone scan and CT tomorrow.

out of sunny skies, we are all stormed over.

They've seen a spot around her femur that is "worrisome."
Worrisome.

That's a gentle way of describing what this mama feels.
All my courageous muster has flown out the window.

And Winnie is my most heart-filled wildebeest.
Dreamer, writer, artist, she feels
every nuance in the room.
Like rough swallows
and puffy eyes.

We have no certain news yet, but
some of you have asked how you can help us as we wait
and I have been thinking...

Definitely prayers
and best thoughts
and any bottled courage
you can send our way.

Do they make that?
Bottled courage?

So here's what I'm thinking -  what about sharing your
words?
verses?
poems?
quotes?
book recommendations - for an eight year-old adventurer and for me.

words to help us remember 
that there is courage
in love,
in faith,
in hope.

I will post news when we know what there is to know.
Thank you, friends.

UPDATE!
Thank you, thank you, thank you.
Good, good news from the docs.
It's not cancerous.
She's still in for some fun ahead with some sort of procedure,
but we'll take that any day over the big one.
Thank you, thank you all for the love and thoughts
and prayers poured our way this week.
Thank you. 

The Funny Thing about Mice

It's a little bit scary to tell you things I'm happy about. 

Things that feel like little green tips at the edges of my wintered-over branches.

 
Not that it's wrong to feel pleased with good things,
but when I remember the gravity of last year
I wonder -
is this okay?
this joy? these painted things?
Will I jinx it somehow?

 
Over the last year, I convinced myself I have permanent writer's block.
But then this week, a few words eeked out, and I wondered.

Maybe it's not writer's block.
Maybe it's just fear.

Fear is something we all have, isn't it?

Fear of failure. of something bad happening.
of shadows. heights. the dark.
Scratchy things. fish. being alone.

What are your crazy fears?

You know what's funny?
All that health craziness last year - that was like facing off against a lion.
I borrowed as much courage as possible.

Now I'm standing on a chair shrieking about a bug -
worried about putting stories on paper!
worried someone won't like them!
 

Oh, for a good gulp of perspective!

I just read "The Tale of Despereaux" by Kate DiCamillo.
It's about a mouse who battles darkness with courageous love.
It's beautiful.

Despereaux strapped on a belt of red thread,
a sewing needle sword,
and plunged into the dungeons to save a princess.

While I don't have dungeons, or a sword,
I want to have courageous love like that mouse,
not concerned about what people will think.
brave.
true.
every day.
not just on heart surgery days. 
in the daily dirt.
in being a writer and artist, too.


So here's what I'm doing.
All fueled up from my Illustrating Picture Books class,
I'm going to the SCBWI conference this weekend.
And I'm entering my art in a portfolio show.


To go with it, I did a little spring cleaning on the blog,
redesigned The Portfolio.
I hope you like the new look around here.
I hope it's good dirt.
And if you're coming to the conference, let's hang out!
I'll be the small mouse in the corner.

 

The Tale of Despereaux, by Kate DiCamillo

How Does Your Garden Grow?

Words still glomm together in my mouth
like lumps of peanut butter.
I speak to people and wonder if they notice, too.
Can one be socially stuttered, but robustly well?
Because I am so alive, so well 
since the surgery.

Maybe these word troubles are writer's block,
part of my recovery from troubles;
an awakening to the idea that life is short.
that more than publishing stories,
I want to love.
to make it count wherever I am.

I still want to write, but my words are hiding.
So...
I'm taking an art class.
 
And oh, what a class!
It's UCSD extension course llustrating Books For Children
with renowned book designer Joy Chu.
And it's amazing.

Maybe I'll find a back door to writing this way,
through visual storytelling.
Or not.

Maybe I'll just enjoy it -
watering a different part of my brain.
creating art.
(happy sigh)


And how does the rest of this garden grow?
How is that sacred dirt of every day?
 
We have a lot of dirt lately.
Lots of squiggly worms that I don't take pictures of -
like scowly faces, and kids throwing fits,
messy hair,


















piled-up laundry,
crumbs under the table.

But how can I not be thankful?
Even for the wormy parts.
There is less to show from this garden now.
but more to feel.
more to soak in and wiggle around.

more family days.
paint and shaving cream.

 a new outlook for Pip!

Sugar Snack turning five!

Not much of a gardener in reality,
still I will tend this sacred dirt,
I will water my back doors to writing, 
and see what wriggles.
what grows.

What are the back doors in your creative life?

What are your cover crops?

When you get stuck, discouraged or allover uninspired,
what do you plant?

How do you water your creative self?

Cooking class? Archery lessons? Trapeze?
Balloon animals? Book club?

My friends,
I thank you for your friendship and patience. 
for the many ways you make this world beautiful.
through your actions and special talents.
for your unique words and work.
for the nurture of your families and friends.
for the many creative ways you give of yourself to the world.

May your garden grow and grow
and grow,
with lots of good dirt
and wiggles. 

Another bonus from my new class? Library finds!

Here are some of my latest faves:

Journey, by Aaron Becker (Won a well-deserved Caldecott Honor this year!)
Mr. Wuffles, by David Weisner (Another Caldecott Honor winner)
Sea of Dreams, by Dennis Nolan

Flora's Very Windy Day, by Jeanne Birdsall, illustrated by Matt Phelan

Harry & Hopper, by Margaret Wild, illustrated by Freya Blackwood
Missing Mommy, by Rebecca Cobb 

On a Beam of Light, A Story of Albert Einstein by Jennifer Berne, illustrated by Vladimir Radunsky
Nelson Mandela, by Kadir Nelson
Bon Appetit!, the delicious life of Julia Child, by Jessie Hartland
Martin de Porres, the Rose in the Desert, by Gary Schmidt, illustrated by David Diaz